Table for four, please
Well, it’s official--Rachael is part of our family and we are her parents. The paperwork stage was actually not too bad. It lasted for about three hours and we had breaks as each family went into various offices to do their work, so it was not constant. We were on tight schedules to do everything by the book, and flexible, Chinese bureaucracies are not.
While I will spare you the play-by-play of the various paper signings, the most important meeting was also the most surreal. The first meeting was with the civil affairs office director who signed the paperwork and decided if we were fit parents for Rachael. Our Chinese guide who prepped us for the details of the meeting escorted us into the office. The actual event was very interesting. The psychological and political tones of the meeting are less than subtle. We walking into a somewhat small room about 6 feet by 12 feet with clean white wall, no adornment except for the Chinese Communist government seal on the wall. In the center of the room was an immense monolithic black table, spotless and sparse except for three things. One was a large red stamp pad, used for inking our thumbs to make thumb prints over our names on various documents and to make a red foot print on Rachael's documents that stay in China. The second object was a black painted wood block with a vertical wire extending about 12 inches high with a cross wire forming a "T" where on the right was the flag of China and on the other side was a red flag of equal size with the sacred symbol of communism, a hammer and sickle. I think I was transfixed on it with a rather dirty look, so I looked away and smiled, reminding myself this wasn't the time for a political statement. The third item on the table was our paperwork folder sitting in front of the director, a very young, well dressed woman who was sitting at its center. The desk was so large, it took up almost the entire room, and it sat upon a small platform, which raised the table and the director up about 3 inches higher than we were. Sitting at the table, its top came up to about my chest middle. We looked up at the director and she looked down at us. When we entered the room, she did not rise to greet us, the table prevented us (purposefully I assume) from shaking hands or any exchanging any other pleasantries. The message was less that subtle.
The director was pleasant, smiled with no other visible forms of emotion or distraction, and asked us a series of questions. Most were absurd, such as "Have you decided you want to adopt this baby?" and "Will you take care of her." Others were more oral testimonies of why we wanted to adopt from China. But we did manage to rattle her a little and got an unexpected reaction. At the end of the questioning, she remarked that she observed from our paperwork that both of us worked, and she requested knowing how we would be able to attend to both children is we were working. I responded that I had arranged my business so that I worked from home and primarily looked after the children and worked when I had time to do so. The director was clearly caught off guard; she leaned into the table, tilted her head, smiled rather warmly and asked, "Really?" We nodded, she sat back in her chair, said "Hmm, okay," and jotted something down with a strange little smile on her face. After, she said that by her observation we were proper parents for this child and she pronounced us the new parents of this little girl and wished us well.
A few more documents were signed, thumbs stamped, and we were on our way. Our guide afterward told us the director had never heard of the man staying with the children and thought it was very odd to the culture she was used to, but that she was pleasantly surprised to hear than men did such things.
After all the paperwork was over, we hit the local “Wal-Mart” to get a few other minor things and came back. Today we had a great adventure visiting a local park and museum for what is referred to as a “minority group of China.” We believe Rachael is now probably a member of this minority. I will go into details about that later. They have a rich culture in many areas of art, dance, and extraordinary architecture. I have pictures and will try to post them, but my memory card from my camera isn't cooperating. I'm working on it.
Anyway, Rachael is doing okay. Last night was pretty rough. I had to walk late into the night for her to finally get to sleep. I'm sure that not being around people who look, or more importantly, sound like her is starting to rattle her a bit. She cried a lot and was very upset, so I walked around the hotel public areas from around 9:00 p.m. to about 12:30 a.m. when she finally fell asleep. I hope she does a bit better tonight. Today, she rode on the front of me in the baby carrier and she did fantastic. She's really starting to warm up to me and seems to enjoy seeing if the hair growing out of my face is detachable. :)
I am heading back to the room now and will see if I can get my memory card working. Tomorrow, we head to a small village outside of town to see the countryside and the conditions of a place likely similar to where Rachael and the other kids came from. The other babies are doing well and the families adopting with us are all great. We have made lifelong friends of them all. We will talk to you soon and hope everyone is well back home.
Take care. 73
While I will spare you the play-by-play of the various paper signings, the most important meeting was also the most surreal. The first meeting was with the civil affairs office director who signed the paperwork and decided if we were fit parents for Rachael. Our Chinese guide who prepped us for the details of the meeting escorted us into the office. The actual event was very interesting. The psychological and political tones of the meeting are less than subtle. We walking into a somewhat small room about 6 feet by 12 feet with clean white wall, no adornment except for the Chinese Communist government seal on the wall. In the center of the room was an immense monolithic black table, spotless and sparse except for three things. One was a large red stamp pad, used for inking our thumbs to make thumb prints over our names on various documents and to make a red foot print on Rachael's documents that stay in China. The second object was a black painted wood block with a vertical wire extending about 12 inches high with a cross wire forming a "T" where on the right was the flag of China and on the other side was a red flag of equal size with the sacred symbol of communism, a hammer and sickle. I think I was transfixed on it with a rather dirty look, so I looked away and smiled, reminding myself this wasn't the time for a political statement. The third item on the table was our paperwork folder sitting in front of the director, a very young, well dressed woman who was sitting at its center. The desk was so large, it took up almost the entire room, and it sat upon a small platform, which raised the table and the director up about 3 inches higher than we were. Sitting at the table, its top came up to about my chest middle. We looked up at the director and she looked down at us. When we entered the room, she did not rise to greet us, the table prevented us (purposefully I assume) from shaking hands or any exchanging any other pleasantries. The message was less that subtle.
The director was pleasant, smiled with no other visible forms of emotion or distraction, and asked us a series of questions. Most were absurd, such as "Have you decided you want to adopt this baby?" and "Will you take care of her." Others were more oral testimonies of why we wanted to adopt from China. But we did manage to rattle her a little and got an unexpected reaction. At the end of the questioning, she remarked that she observed from our paperwork that both of us worked, and she requested knowing how we would be able to attend to both children is we were working. I responded that I had arranged my business so that I worked from home and primarily looked after the children and worked when I had time to do so. The director was clearly caught off guard; she leaned into the table, tilted her head, smiled rather warmly and asked, "Really?" We nodded, she sat back in her chair, said "Hmm, okay," and jotted something down with a strange little smile on her face. After, she said that by her observation we were proper parents for this child and she pronounced us the new parents of this little girl and wished us well.
A few more documents were signed, thumbs stamped, and we were on our way. Our guide afterward told us the director had never heard of the man staying with the children and thought it was very odd to the culture she was used to, but that she was pleasantly surprised to hear than men did such things.
After all the paperwork was over, we hit the local “Wal-Mart” to get a few other minor things and came back. Today we had a great adventure visiting a local park and museum for what is referred to as a “minority group of China.” We believe Rachael is now probably a member of this minority. I will go into details about that later. They have a rich culture in many areas of art, dance, and extraordinary architecture. I have pictures and will try to post them, but my memory card from my camera isn't cooperating. I'm working on it.
Anyway, Rachael is doing okay. Last night was pretty rough. I had to walk late into the night for her to finally get to sleep. I'm sure that not being around people who look, or more importantly, sound like her is starting to rattle her a bit. She cried a lot and was very upset, so I walked around the hotel public areas from around 9:00 p.m. to about 12:30 a.m. when she finally fell asleep. I hope she does a bit better tonight. Today, she rode on the front of me in the baby carrier and she did fantastic. She's really starting to warm up to me and seems to enjoy seeing if the hair growing out of my face is detachable. :)
I am heading back to the room now and will see if I can get my memory card working. Tomorrow, we head to a small village outside of town to see the countryside and the conditions of a place likely similar to where Rachael and the other kids came from. The other babies are doing well and the families adopting with us are all great. We have made lifelong friends of them all. We will talk to you soon and hope everyone is well back home.
Take care. 73
posted by KB8WFH at 7:37 AM
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